This isn't a sci-fi blog. But I have to ask. Have you ever experienced one of those moments when the words seem to fail you and the only thing you can do is . . . well.
We all have.
Have you ever experienced one of those moments when you were the reason for relying on the facepalm? I have because I just don't want to explain how in a moment I went from being such a smart person to a total idiot. Well, idiot may be a strong word but I have felt that way.
This story happened over 25 years ago. But I remember it vividly. I was a youth pastor at a church in central Florida. I walked out of my office to see the Senior Pastor. My route always took me by the soda machine. As I turned the corner, I caught the pastor's son shoulder deep in the machine. He figured out how to get a soda on the house! I understood why the machine was losing coins. I marched the young man to his father's office. Father (facepalmed) and then told his son to go outside and sit on a stump in the backyard. That was around 10 am. At 4 pm when it was time for me to go home I walked outside to find the young man still sitting on that stump. Confused, I went to the pastor's office and asked, "Hey, is your son still on that stump?" At first, he looked at me like I lost my mind. Then it hit him. (Facepalm) While muttering something how his lovely bride was going to kill him for this. He ran outside and found his son, who had been sitting there all day. She didn't speak to him for a few days over that one.
Romans 8:1 There is therefore now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus.
Forgiving your self is one of the hardest things that you will ever have to do. You may be thinking, Russ, I (facepalm) 24 hours a day. Well, good news. You don't have to.
Forgiveness comes from God. Do this first. God will forgive you because you place your faith in Him. However, do not think that you can just "get" God's forgiveness if you have no intention of permitting Him to change your character. God wants to do a work in your life that stops that sin.
Guilt is a good thing - no it's horrible - yes it's good. Guilt shows us our sin. But if you wallow in that guilt you will start a self-destructive cycle that can wreak havoc in your life. Thank God for the guilt, but let Him take it from you through His grace and mercy.
Move on. When you camp out in your past, you're doomed to repeat it. You can find healing through salvation. You can find your ministry on the cross you bear. You can find hope in the midst of your chaos.
PRAY: Dear Jesus, forgive me and teach me how to forgive myself. AMEN