Marriage and Pride

There is a difference between humility and being humbled. The first is by choice and the latter is usually force fed to you. I don't know anyone who really likes it, it just isn't our nature. But humility is a HUGE key to the success of any marriage.

Pride can be a problem. First of all the Bible says that pride comes before the fall. How many times in our arrogance have we "stood our ground" only to be humiliated in the end for making a bad decision (and a big deal about it)? The Bible goes on to say that God hates pride. (And I use the word hate here correctly.) So now you're on God's bad side. Not smart. This kind of arrogance though isn't just being stubborn about something - it's about not giving God His place in your heart, marriage and home because you "know better." There is another kind of pride that shows it's ugly head when we determine that we are better, smarter, wiser or more experienced than our spouse. Then when we act like it we end up devaluing their worth as a spouse and as a human being.

Pride is a sin. I'm not talking about looking at something that you have done with satisfaction or being proud of your child for something great they have accomplished. I'm talking about taking credit where God should be getting credit and taking control of things that God should have control of. Now you're playing God and that is a sin.

What happens next? Someone is going to get humbled and a lot of people are going to get hurt. Let me explain. God loves you so much that He desires for you to spend eternity with Him in heaven. This is a good idea. But if your pride is in the way - God is going to do something about it. He is more concerned with your salvation than He is with your comfort. For example:

Years ago I knew a man who as a father and a husband appeared to be a hard working man who loved his family very, very much. However, He felt that He could do whatever He desired. That he had the right to do whatever. He had a very successful job and made lots of money. He had a beautiful wife and a child who loved and adored him. However, something was wrong. After Betty and I had moved away we watched his life spiral out of control until it lay in ruins. He was divorced, rejected, out of a job and bearing the weight of his sins. In his arrogance he thought he could be married with a family and have a mistress and start another family at the same time.

When God allowed all of this to be exposed a lot of people were hurt. In the face of his sin he made some prideful decisions that he would later regret. At the end of his life - he finally gave his heart to Jesus and accepted Him into His life. What's my point? If He would have done this first the miracle working power of God could have come and healed hearts and lives. Disasters could have been avoided and futures been rewritten with a better ending. The best thing you can do for your marriage and family is to remain humble before God. Don't let arrogance determine your decision, but place your spouse and children before yourself and your needs. God will take care of your needs according to His riches in glory - trust Him and will not have to "fight' for what is yours. He will take care of you.